10 Wonky English Things I'm Loving
1. Funky old buildings
This jewelry store in Windsor is a bit crooked, yes, but still fully functioning.
2. Bent-but-not-broken Senior Citizens
"Crooked in build yet functioning" also describes the majority of the age 80+ crowd I've seen in England, who for the most part seem to be much more mobile than their American counterparts. I rarely if ever see an older person in a wheelchair, and they are almost always better dressed than I am.
3. Straight-up SEXY Parking Spots
Making the spot my iPhone wallpaper was just the trick for garnering the perfect kid groan.
Sign says: ON THIS SITE SEPT. 5, 1782 NOTHING HAPPENED
6. A Store named "FATFACE"
The running joke in my extended family is us replying to each other with the question, "Is that a fat joke?"
Well, FATFACE, is it?!
This jewelry store in Windsor is a bit crooked, yes, but still fully functioning.
2. Bent-but-not-broken Senior Citizens
"Crooked in build yet functioning" also describes the majority of the age 80+ crowd I've seen in England, who for the most part seem to be much more mobile than their American counterparts. I rarely if ever see an older person in a wheelchair, and they are almost always better dressed than I am.
3. Straight-up SEXY Parking Spots
Close to home? Check.
End spot? Check.
No uphill walks with groceries? Check!
When you hunt for street parking multiple times a day as I do, finding a real gem of a space can really set your heart a flutter.
So much so that you photograph that sexy beast of a parking spot.
End spot? Check.
No uphill walks with groceries? Check!
When you hunt for street parking multiple times a day as I do, finding a real gem of a space can really set your heart a flutter.
So much so that you photograph that sexy beast of a parking spot.
4. New Opportunities for Offspring Embarrassment
Like a dad wearing black socks and sandals with a Speedo, I proudly called my newfound parking spot "sexy" and reveled in my kids' blushing and head-shaking.
5. Mannerly Neighbor Mocking
This guy obviously wants to poke fun at the numerous historical markers in the area, yet keeps it discreet.
Sign says: ON THIS SITE SEPT. 5, 1782 NOTHING HAPPENED
6. A Store named "FATFACE"
The running joke in my extended family is us replying to each other with the question, "Is that a fat joke?"
Well, FATFACE, is it?!
7. Mr. Whippy
It's soft serve that tastes like it was blended with cool whip.
Enough said.
8. Sand-free Pebble Beaches
While sinking your toes in the sand and water on a hot day is fantastic, we don't get a lot of hot days in the UK. And besides, that sand ends up in ALL THE CREVICES, especially with kids playing in it.
It's kind of nice to enjoy the ocean without sand falling out of your bra at the end of the day.
It's soft serve that tastes like it was blended with cool whip.
Enough said.
8. Sand-free Pebble Beaches
While sinking your toes in the sand and water on a hot day is fantastic, we don't get a lot of hot days in the UK. And besides, that sand ends up in ALL THE CREVICES, especially with kids playing in it.
It's kind of nice to enjoy the ocean without sand falling out of your bra at the end of the day.
9. Royal Guard hats
Who decided that placing a black bear cub on a guy's head -- and over their eyes!-- would improve their job in security?
I'm giving them props just for their commitment to the fashion tradition.
And last but not least, the wonkiest thing about England that I'm loving right now, is the fact that:
10. You Can Order Tea EVERYWHERE
Whether you’re buying lumber or a new wardrobe, you're still never more than 20 steps from a cafe and it's usually within the store-- especially at garden centers!
Maybe the damp makes people drowsy and in need of warm caffeine? Whatever it is, Brits love their tea and coffee and this American has even converted to a tea drinker herself.
But I still don't own a kettle, and that's the "wonkiest" thing an English person can hear you say.
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